I Dream to Remember, I Dance To Forget
by TheKittenLeftForDead
Summary: I needn't remember who I am to dance. I need only to listen to the sound of the music beating. AU


Disclaimer: i own nothing of Avatar the Last Airbender, that belongs to Nickelodeon

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Do your dreams speak to you? Mine do. Mine is

It's a nightmare, I know. There's a boy, hair dark as night, and eyes gold as the sun's rays. What a contrast. These are not his only strange features. A mark, almost like a burn, scars the left side of his face.

He's a teenager, I know that. Perhaps a few years younger than myself. He sits and stare at me, for a long, long while. And I hate to say it, but I stare right back. At my dream. At his scar.

He opens his mouth, as if to speak, then shuts it immediately.

_What is it_, I think. Almost as if hearing me, he shakes his head and stand, coming over. He bows before me, and hold out his hand.

"A dance, my lady?" he requests. It is the first time I hear his voice, rough and controlled. I shake my head, no. The thought that _I cannot dance_, enters my mind. He smirks.

"I believe you to be a wonderful dancer" he insists, stepping back.

"You believe wrong" I say

"No, you have danced this dance before, trust me" the boy says

"Why should I?"I say and look down at my nightgown "besides, I can't dance in this" his face his confused.

"In what, you're perfect"

"In-" but I cut myself off in surprise. I wear a red satin dress down to my knees. So light, so beautiful, so soft.

"A dress is simple and plain without it's wearer" he says, once again holding out his hand.

"Please, my lady"

And I find myself dancing unfamiliar steps and foreign moves, somewhat trusting him. They're so strange yet so exotic. The music pounds within my ears, but I see nothing that could be playing it. Nothing surround us. Yet, this does not matter, for all the while, I stare at the boy. He stares right back

It is like a dream. Almost.

This is where the dream ends.

The music because faster as our scenery changes. We are still dancing, but we are not alone entirely. We are not in nothingness. We are dancing on stone, within a temple, I know. Before us stands a great statue, a monk, legs folded eyes peaceful. Eyes watchful. _Does he watch us_ I wonder

"He is there to watch _over _us" the boy explains. I nod.

Then the scenery changes again, our moves become faster.

We are in the same place, the statue still stands, but it has been uncared for. It has cracked. It is covered in moss. His eyes are not watchful, they are dead.

"What has happened here?" I say, aloud. The boy doesn't answer, he only stares. He only dances.

I blink and the statue is gone, as is the temple. People surround us, all lively and bustling around a market place area. They do not see us, they see through us. People buy, sell, trade, and socialize in their green robe-like clothes and sun-hats. The music stands stops, and we stand still for half a second, as what is in front of us disappears.

We are in the same area, but no one is there. There is no bustling market place, no laughing children, no selling….no one.

Everything is scorched, burned through, wrecked. Though this is a dream, I can smell something…dead. No someone, I realize with disgust, feeling as though I should gag. The music that picks up is faster…angrier. As are our moves. I do not struggle to keep up, I want to leave as fast as I can.

The boy smiles grimly as the scene before us fades away.

There is only whiteness…snow, below me. I know I should feel cold, and yet….

I look around, still spinning away with the boy. Tents surround us, fires burning in each one. _Fire_ I think, remembering the scorches in the market place. There is already an emptiness to this place, I can feel it. It is almost as though whatever happened to the other places has already happened here….and I've noticed the pattern. With a lurch, I realize it can only happen again.

Children laugh, they play. Adults converse, discussing important matters. Warriors train.

All unaware of what will happen.

As if on cue, a grayness clouds my vision. Snow, I see. The music is at a thrilling beat, matching the scene around us. The moves involves harder, fighting moves.

The boy observes the scene apathetically.

Everything fades away as the villagers realize what is happening. There is screaming.

What I see next is the aftermath, I assume. People cry warriors hold their heads in their hands. Children look so afraid and small.

One child in particular. Her hair long brown and braided, her face tan and so contorted so sad. It is not these features that make her stand out…..

It is her eyes. They are pure blue. I recognize them…I see…I see….

But the village disappears before I can place it.

The music slows, and the moves calm down. Yet I am filled with anger

"Who did this!" I demand. The boy raises an eyebrow

"You know" I says.

"I don't, I don't!" I scream. The boy sighs and there is a final site before us. A man, his hair white and long, legs folded, eyes closed. Almost a cruel depiction of the monk from before. He fades away….a man looking much like him is there instead. His hair is black, falling down his back, he sits in a throne, high above us. Though he cannot see us, I am filled with an overwhelming sense to run away.

"You needn't run now, you never did" the boy says. _I never_….

The man fades away as well and is replaced by….the boy. I shake my head…I don't remember….but I do.

So much death, so much destruction….the boy….he dances…with fire.

We failed..…failed what? The world…didn't we?

The boy is no longer with me, I dance alone. The boy sits on the throne and watches. The music is so confusing…just like everything else. So calming yet so invigorating…in a bad way.

It is almost like a trap in itself…just like the dream…no the nightmare. Just like the betrayer…who was that?

The moves are jointly, they don't flow…they hurt.

The throne the boy sits upon goes alight, with everything else in the….throne room?

What the boy is saying? His lips are moving…I can only hear the flames flicker around me.

Isn't he afraid to be sitting in fire? He should be…I won't help him. How could I?

_Water_ the though enters my mind. There is no water, though. Not enough to matter.

"Do you remember now?" the boy says. Yes I remember some things…

I continue to dance.

"You can stop now, I have" but I don't, I can't. The music wont let me. I wont let myself.

"You can stop" the boy repeats. Still, I move with the jointly music, so uneven now.

"STOP!" he yells "It is over, there is nothing more you can do. Listen to the music, it has given up, as should you"

But I cannot, we….did _we_ give up? No, we failed.

I stop as the music drains away from my ears and the dance moves become to foreign to recognize.

"Sit" the boy commands, patting the seat next to him. I still stand. Who is he, a mere boy, to tell me what to do?

"Still stubborn, I see" he observes. _Still?…._

"Please sit down, my lady" the boy says a gentlemanly manner I don't buy for a second.

"Fine" he lets it go, crossing his arms over his chest. "Though it will be much harder to speak to you from ten feet away"

I stand my ground, literally.

"Very well" he mutters "I had to do it, you know"

"Do what?" I ask. He looks at me, exasperated.

"Still, you don't remember" he says to himself, head in hands. "After all that, you don't remember _anything_?"

I shake my head, confused "Maybe if you tell me what I am supposed to remember…."

"I cannot" the boys says, and lifts his head up "but maybe…"

He raises himself from the throne chair and comes over to me, stopping a foot away.

"Look at this scar" he points to the mark "Remember…please"

I look, the skin is red and…rough looking. Wouldn't it be rough to touch? Wouldn't I….did I?

Mother….cave….

It hits me, that scene, touching the boy's face…had I been much younger? How could I forget? I hated him…I know that…and yet I do not know his name. Why did I hate him…what did he do?

"Yes" I gasp out "Some. It makes no sense, though"

The boy nods understandingly. "Please…..try"

I do, I think about the girl I saw, the moves we danced, the villages attacked…the statue

_He watches over us_, the boy had said. He had done a bad job, that I know.

It hits me now, everything. All that we had been through, what we had done and seen, who that little girl was, how we had failed.

I don't understand it all, but I remember it, for the most part.

I stagger back, as if a weight has suddenly fallen upon my shoulders.

"I had to do it" he whispers "I had to make you remember"

"I know" I say and shudder. I hate it, but I know.

"You remember everything?" he asks, gently holding out his hand. I retreat back farther.

"Somewhat…maybe…I don't know" I mutter. Yes this is a nightmare.

"Do you remember what we did after we failed?" I shake my head. I remember coming back home, feeling so alone. Everyone I knew and loved….dead. The avatar…gone. But the boy…the boy stayed. He betrayed us, I remember, but he stayed.

"We waited years to find the new avatar…years" the boy whispers "Together…we searched blindly in broken nations." Yes, yes, I'm remembering. We found the avatar, abandoned because of his bending, raised him, trained him, and made everyone forget…he took away their bending. We took away their bending. It had been the only way to have relative peace, by making sure they couldn't use their powers against each other. For though Ozai had died, his people remained loyal to him. Not to the banished prince. Azula had taken the spot of her father.

It had been a horrible thing to do, but the only option available to us. We had done what the Avatar had tried to do on a mass scale.

"Do you remember us?"

Us…._What does he…..oh_

"Yes oh" the young man says.

The cave…the traveling together….living together….had I?….had we…

Yes we had.

"You said you love me"

Do I? Did I? had I not been a different person?

"You are not different, older yes…different no"

i'm confused, because I am a different person, the gods above have given me a second chance, but not him.

But I don't love him, I don't think. Maybe once upon a time…perhaps….or maybe…

I look at the boy's eyes. They're so familiar, so welcoming.

I dance. I start as the music enters my ears. We failed yes…but I can forget…I can forget the horrid means we used to balance it out. If only I dance. The music is so fast so thrilling, I forget everything I learned. The boy yells in dismay and I anger I know. Though, now I don't know why. I dance through the villages, the market place, the temple, I dance through the void and the nothingness. I dance to make it all go away. I dance to forget.

I do not feel satin along my body as I awake and whimper. Only cotton.

_Why satin…._

"Another dream?" Aang asks from beside me. The lights are off, but the television blares.

I nod my head "I don't want to remember"

I'm still half asleep, I know, barely listening to what I say.

"Remember what?" Aang asks, turning on the light. I open my mouth, almost answering, when I lose it.

"I don't know…" Aang shakes his head.

"Go back to sleep Katara"

I close my eyes and put the covers over my head as Aang turns out the light, but I don't sleep for a long, long while.

What _did _I not want to remember? I ask myself over and over again. I get no answers.

All I can see is the boy dancing, so much dancing. Did I dance with him? Will I ever?

Perhaps I'll never know.

And maybe, just maybe, that's a good thing.


End file.
